Almost a year....

I have almost done it... almost survived the first year without Hazel. It has been a long 11 months and 3 weeks. So much in our lives have changed, it has truly been a roller coaster. I am holding on, getting stronger everyday and remembering to be thankful for all the blessings I have in my life.

Today I found this poem on another Angel mommies blog and thought I would post it here.

You never said you're leaving

You never said goodbye

You were gone before I knew it,

And only God knows why.

A million times I needed you,

A million times I cried.

If love alone could have saved you,

You never would have died.

In life I loved you dearly

In death I love you still

In my heart you hold a place,

That nobody can fill.

It broke my heart to lose you,

But you didn't go alone

For part of me went with you,

The day God took you home.

Author unknown

I bought floating lanterns for Hazel's Angel day celebration. I was so happy to get them in the mail this week. The kids, my mom and I decided to do a 'test launch' tonight. They were much bigger than we thought they would be and took a little time to inflate but once it took off it was amazing! I was a little worried about the twisting and bobbing that it did, I was sure that with my luck it was going to fall and catch someones house on fire!!! We watched until it flew out of sight and while I'm certain it didn't catch anyone's house on fire I would like to know how many people saw it and wondered what in the heck it was! :) I can't wait to let them off together. The kids want to draw pictures and write notes to attach to the lanterns to 'send' to Hazel. It will be a special day and while I am not sure that I am really ready to face her first birthday without her here, I know that I will be surrounded by the people that love me the most and for that I feel blessed.